Spiritual Mentors

By Leila & Trish Briggs

At some point, during your spiritual journey of self-discovery, you will seek a spiritual mentor, or you already have.

At different stages of our journey, we may seek out different people as mentors. Each time, our intention is to find someone who has already received part of the wisdom that we are seeking, so that he/she/they can give us direction or even get us started in the right direction.  

By definition, a mentor is an experienced and trusted advisor. We don’t disagree with this definition, but it is too simple when dealing with the spiritual. 

Choosing a mentor for your spiritual journey is more complicated than choosing one for your career or education. It is easier to judge someone’s experience in a career or education based on what they have accomplished as per their resume or curriculum vitae.

Spiritual mentorship is different. Being experienced in spiritual matters can mean many different things to different people. And how do you measure experience in spiritual matters?

We can measure what qualifies as spiritual experience in religions based on their hierarchy and education within their organized framework.

However, true spiritual evolution is unique and authentic to each person, and a reflection of his/her/their beliefs (and fears).

It is a very personal and vulnerable journey of self-discovery that eventually leads back to ONE or WHOLEness.

The only way that we know to determine spiritual experience is through discernment. One way discernment is gained is through asking questions. Get to know the person or chosen mentor; what is their real experience and qualities? Do they align with you and your goals? Do they align with your ethics?

Qualities that we personally seek are truth, integrity, honesty, open-mindedness, willingness to listen, to share new ideas, and grow. We view every spiritual journey as an evolution of awareness and personal growth (both for the mentor and mentee). Qualities that usually are a red flags are manipulation, passive aggressive behaviors, inability to admit when they do not know or cannot see, or not encouraging your individualism within the mentor/mentee dynamic.

We also recommend using caution and discernment when it comes to trust. Trust should not be instantaneous; we need to give it time to grow, so we can settle into it naturally. Trust comes through communication, consistency, understanding, and boundary work.

Mentors come and go throughout your life for different reasons. And, yes, you can outgrow a mentor. Above all, if your gut is telling you something isn’t right about a mentor relationship. Listen and work with it! Whether that work is to ask questions, let go, move on, or encourage growth and evolution through communication. It is part of the journey!